Why Most Sales Are Lost Before the Pitch Even Starts
Whether you’re negotiating million-dollar deals or trying to get someone to pass the butter, congratulations—you are a salesperson.
Every day, we make requests. Requests for time, attention, participation, or a simple reply to a long-lost prospect. And in every one of those moments, success begins with an invitation.
The value of the invitations you make determines the ease with which you are able to achieve your goals.
Strong invitations—whether soft and kind or bold and authoritative—get answered.
Weak invitations—unclear, sent to the wrong people, or lacking urgency—get ignored.
Today, we’re talking about those seemingly small invitations that can make or break your success. And if you’re in sales (which, again, you are), mastering this first step could be the game-changer you’ve been looking for.
Why Most Invitations Fail
Most people aren’t paying attention.
I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but we are busy. And distracted. And… not paying attention. (Bonus points if you caught the fact that I just said that twice.)
Sales professionals, business owners, and even experienced closers often don’t take the time to refine their invitation process. And that leads to three common mistakes:
1️⃣ Talking to the wrong people
2️⃣ Making vague or weak requests
3️⃣ Failing to consider the best approach
If you’ve ever attended a business mixer or chamber of commerce event, you’ve probably encountered someone guilty of all three.
And that brings me to one of my favorite examples—Bob Vance, Vance Refrigeration.
(Cue Phyllis from The Office introducing her boyfriend… or, more accurately, Bob taking over and introducing himself.)
(Here’s the Youtube link for a quick chuckle…)
Let’s just say… It’s awkward…
Sure, we could pitch every person we meet, but should we?
To begin, you ought to start with knowing your perfect customer.
Meet Ocean
One of the biggest reasons invitations fail is that they’re given to the wrong people.
Take Lululemon, for example. They didn’t build a billion-dollar brand by trying to sell yoga pants to everyone.
They created a fictional customer named “Ocean”—a 32-year-old, successful, fitness-loving woman making $100K+ per year.
Every decision they make is based on her wants, needs, and lifestyle.
If you don’t have a clear vision of your perfect customer, you’re just throwing invites into the void.
Question to ask yourself: Who’s your perfect customer? Who’s someone that if they said, “yes” to your invitation, offer or request, it could make a huge difference in your career, work, or life?
Once you know your perfect customer, you can begin to craft invitations that get accepted quickly.
How to Make Invitations That Get a “YES”
So what does a great invitation actually sound like?
Let me show you:
Weak: “Hey, let’s catch up sometime.”
Strong: “Hey [Name], I’m hosting a private training on [specific topic] next Thursday for a few business owners, and I think you’d benefit from it. Are you free at 10 AM or 2 PM?”
See the difference?
The second version is:
🔹Clear (They know exactly what you’re asking.)
🔹Urgent (It’s happening next Thursday.)
🔹Specific (They know who else will be there.)
Another tool in my arsenal came from my studies on the book Influence by Dr. Robert Cialdini. By crafting your invitations with one or a combination of these psychological “levers”, we will drastically improve our chances to get a “Yes”.
The 7 Levers of Influence
Cialdini’s 7 Levers of Influence are:
🔹 Unity– Make them feel like they belong.
🔹 Scarcity– Limited seats = higher demand.
🔹 Authority– People trust experts.
🔹 Social Proof– Show them who else is saying YES.
🔹 Commitment & Consistency– Small commitments lead to bigger ones.
🔹 Liking– People buy from those they like.
🔹 Reciprocity – Give value before asking for anything.
If you use just two or three of these in your invitations, you’ll instantly see better responses, faster decisions, and fewer ghosted clients.
You will, however, need to be good at “the dance”… or handling objections.
Handling Objections
Even with a great invitation, some people will still hesitate.
Here’s how to handle the three most common objections:
❌ “I need to think about it.” ✅ “What would help you decide now?”
❌ “I don’t have time.” ✅ “How do you currently solve this problem?”
❌ “I can’t afford it.” ✅ “That’s exactly why we should talk!”
(I used these in my old position to rather great success. In that role, I found that many times the reasons that my prospects gave me for not being able to work with me were the exact reasons they needed to work with me!
When you expect and prepare for objections, you can confidently guide prospects toward a real decision—whether that’s a YES or a NO.
Final Thought: Make Your Invitations Impossible to Ignore
At the end of the day, every great sale starts with a great invitation.
If you’re not getting strong responses, quick decisions, or high-quality leads, it’s time to fix your invitations.
Here’s your challenge:
1️⃣ Refine your perfect customer (Your “Ocean”).
2️⃣ Rewrite one of your past invitations using today’s principles.
3️⃣ Try it out this week and track your results.
If you think you’d get value from doing this with a group, you ought to join our “Close Big Sales” Lunch & Learn Series in partnership the Ventura Chamber of Commerce.
This is the first of three webinars, and everyone in attencance will walk away with actionable steps to upgrade their sales chops when it comes to making invitations.
To register, go to: Registration Link
For more information, go to: Ventura Chamber of Commerce Lunch & Learn
The value of the invitations you make determines the ease with which you are able to achieve your goals.
You owe it to yourself to make better invitations.