We’ve been conditioned to chase expertise. (Just look at how quickly we jumped on the AI train—without learning how to drive it or stopping to ask for directions…)
Degrees.
Certifications.
Systems.
IQ points.
We’re told that if we just “get smarter”, we’ll go further.
But what if that’s not true? What if getting another advanced degree doesn’t actually mean you’ll get ahead?
In today’s workplace, your ability to connect beats your ability to compute.
More and more research is finding that the biggest factor separating the best mentors, managers, and leaders from the others isn’t brilliance.
It’s emotional intelligence.
It’s the “quiet” skillset. Things like:
- Reading the room before speaking.
- Managing your temper under pressure.
- Knowing when someone needs space—and when they need support.
- Staying approachable, even when you’re overwhelmed.
EQ (Emotional Intelligence) isn’t just a buzzword. It’s the real-world currency of leadership.
According to TalentSmart, EQ is the strongest predictor of performance, responsible for 58% of success in all job types.
And 90% of top performers? High EQ.
Meanwhile, those who lack EQ consistently:
- Burn out their teams
- Get passed up for promotions
- Struggle to influence or inspire
Here’s what I’ve learned from working with professionals:
The smartest person in the room often gets ignored.
Especially when they lack warmth, humility, or listening skills.
The real leaders?
They see people. They listen. They model calm in chaos. They make others feel safe, seen, and significant.
They’re not necessarily the person in charge or with the title.
We don’t follow Spocks. We follow Captain Kirks.
Logic gets respect. Empathy earns loyalty.
(Paradoxically, in a funny/not funny way, they also tend to threaten their own leaders when they utilize a higher EQ. It’s incredibly valuable to learn how to be political about your EQ… which also requires a higher EQ…)
If you want to lead, sell, coach, or grow anything—start here:
- Name your emotions. “If you can’t name it, you can’t tame it.”
- Slow down to speed up. EQ isn’t fast-twitch. It’s self-regulated.
- Get feedback and be open to it. People experience you differently from how you experience yourself.
- Choose connection over control. Simply wielding your authority isn’t your edge—your relatability is.
No—you probably don’t need another degree or crash course on ChatGPT prompts.
But you may need a reset.
A reset on how you lead.
How you listen.
How you regulate.
How you show up when things get messy.
And that starts with EQ.
No fluff. No corporate clichés.
Just clarity, calm, and competence.
Your next level of leadership won’t come from more credentials.
It’ll come from more connection.